“In the last seven days, have I received recognition or praise for good work?”
That question travels with five siblings. Do I know what is expected of me at work? Do I have the materials and equipment I need to do my work right? Do I have the opportunity to do what I do best every day? Does my supervisor, or someone at work, seem to care about me as a person? Is there someone at work who encourages my development?
Gallup found those six, plain as saltines, predict whether people stay, produce, and keep the customers happy. I met them on page 234 of The Power of Moments, where the authors note the last three might as well have been written by a psychologist who studies close relationships. (Workplace survey, relationship researcher, same handwriting.)
Notice who holds the pen. Every question is answered by the person standing where the care is supposed to land. None of the six asks the boss whether they care, because the answer is always yes, always sincere, and sincerity isn’t data.
At home, my instruments all sit on the giving side. Every morning I write one line on a big wall calendar about something from the day before that I appreciated. It is the most adored piece of paper in Dane County, practically blushing on its nail… and by Gallup’s design, it’s filling out the wrong half of the survey. The calendar knows what I noticed. Whether anybody in those lines heard about it is another matter.
Two scraps of wording carry the whole list. The first is “seven days.” Love at home gets treated like a full keg in the walk-in, cold and heavy and assumed. Nobody checks the line until somebody pulls a glass of foam. Gallup only cares what got poured this week.
The second is “seem,” a four-letter word in a trench coat, the most honest thing ever smuggled into an HR document. Care that never shows up as evidence scores a zero.
Try question one at home. During a poetry week I sent my daughters on a scavenger hunt. They pounced on every item like it owed them money and never quite grasped that the loot was supposed to become a poem. Ask whether they knew what was expected of them and they’d have said yes, gloriously. They were right. It just wasn’t the job I had in my head.
Question two flips, too. When the girls storyboarded a short film, they ran the show and I was the materials and equipment, a dad-shaped tripod holding a phone.
Friendship never came with a job description, only a calendar, and the calendar belongs to somebody else. My notes from a year of weekly side projects say it flat: anything that needs another person’s calendar tends not to happen. Hold your friendships to the seven-day window and count how many have gone quarterly (generously). Every one of those friends would say you care. Seem is a different number.
Gallup says these questions even predict customer satisfaction, forecast by asking the person serving the customer whether anybody noticed their work this week. Care runs downstream. Paint your values across the building in letters you can read from the parking lot, and the customer still only tastes whatever the last person behind the counter had left in the tank. What you meant is the giving side. What it seemed like this week is the only part anyone buys.
The people at home will never fill out a survey. They’re answering all six anyway, every week, over cereal and in the back seat, no link required. You get the results the way companies do… late, in the retention numbers, when someone you raised decides how often to call.
Stay Positive & Ask Them

