Month: February 2013

Well, That’s Interesting!

Garth Beyer

After a truly phenomenal speech, I asked UW Madison’s Dean of Students, Lori Berquam, how she got so great and comfortable with public speaking.

“It wasn’t until I realized I had something worth saying,” she replied.

She mentioned that she didn’t enjoy public speaking for the longest time because she didn’t have anything interesting to say – or at least she didn’t think it was interesting. We shared a laugh together at the idea of how simple it is to be good at anything, not just public speaking.

Be interesting.

You’ll never truly be good at anything until you learn to be interesting at it.

 

Stay Positive & Often Times, Being Interesting Begins With Being Interested

Garth E. Beyer

Why So Many People Talk About Making A Change But Never Follow Through

Garth Beyer

In simple quick terms, it’s because they only talk about following through with the change.

Now that you’re more curious…

In more thorough terms,

we’re naturally inclined to use our imagination and that definitely works to our advantage. However, too often we jump the gun and focus more on what we are going to do rather than the simple – and much more fun – process of exploring our options.

We talk about the diets we will start. We talk about the idea of moving in with someone new. We talk about quitting our job. We talk about taking a spontaneous trip. We talk and never do.

I’m not suggesting that we don’t talk about what we are going to do (there are many benefits to it), it’s more along the lines of suggesting talking about what we are going to do.

Talking as in a two-way street. To talk about the change you’re going to make, it’s one way.

Deciding you are going to make a change in your life is truly great and usually the tipping point kind of attitude people need to turn their life around or redirect it in the way they want. However, if we explored the options we have; if we discussed with others what making the change will entail; if we imagined a hundred different scenarios regarding the change we want to make, but also the changes we could otherwise make, then we will be much more likely to follow through.

When we think in concrete terms, “I’m going to do this,” our brain subconsciously works to give us reasons not to. As a result, the change we said we were going to make, we don’t.

To follow through with a change you want to make, start talking about it.

 

Stay Positive & You’re Imagination Is Pretty Good At Making What It Thinks Into Reality

Garth E. Beyer

Why It’s So Hard To Connect

Garth Beyer

We wear too many accessories. Too much cologne. Too many patches, badges, and pins. We can’t connect using these mediums. Just because you share the same band as someone, doesn’t make you connected. It’s simply a visual effect, a momentary lapse of our barrier.

Look at what you wear, look at your desktop background, look at your Facebook profile. Trying to connect to someone by asking them their “favourites” is like selfishly stating that you’re going to have a ham sandwich two weeks from now. Just because you will, doesn’t mean you will have someone else to eat a ham sandwich with you. There is no connection in it, or in favorites, emblems, and markers.

The stylization of our lives, in comparison with others, is just a way to calculate the possibility of having a better time in the future – it, in no way, guarantees there WILL be a future.

The internet is playing a dictative role in preventing connections. Yes, you read that right. In one sense, on face value, the internet is corrupting the connection (or in many cases, preventing it completely). It allows us to emblematize ourselves and to show our aspirations, but it’s where all talk and no action happens.

The internet has sucked us into what I plainly call, The Search. The internet strives off of us being on it. And when you think about what we search for on the internet, we can Google a question, but we’re not looking for an answer. No. What we are looking for is a connection to the people who are asking the same question and a connection to the people who are answering that question. (Neither of which – the question or the answer – can provide. They are again, merely symbols providing an illusive connection.)

Because of The Search, we’ve been programmed to think that there will always be someone we can “connect” with better. So we ask different questions, search for different answers, IM this person, comment on this post, etc,. We explore the social networks, follow people, “like” pages, and view profiles to see if the person or group will be a suitable match.

And, of course, once we find someone. We begin our search for the next person or group without creating a real connection.

This in turn, plays an effect on our real world, the unplugged world. For years people would advocate that you never settle for anything but the best: in relationships, in friendships, in partnerships, in business, and so on. Now the current trend, the dominating idea in the physical world, is that there is always someone who you can “connect” with on a greater level.

The Search mentality equated with the online world, has now become the mentality of the unplugged world. This leaves us with the reason why it’s so hard to connect with people.

– continuation of post is open for discussion –

 

Stay Positive & Maintain A Positive-Realist Mindset, The Online World Is Not A Utopia

Garth E. Beyer