GarthBox

No two days are ever really the same, but the ones that are drastically different – and when we know that they’re going to be – can wind us up in a frustrated and emotionally distraught rut through the evening.

Allow me to share a personal experience.

Yesterday I knew I had a lot of writing to do: eight straight hours of it. Mentally, I was prepared to tackle the work in my silo, earbuds in, without disruption or needing to engage in any large decisions or to receive feedback.

Despite my expectations for the day, both activities occurred and they were more impactful (read: draining) than normal because I wasn’t mentally prepared for them.

Feel familiar?

It’s worth considering what it means to have a balanced mind. My thought is that a balanced mind carries with it expectations of anything and everything occurring at any given time – that way we’re not as put off or hurt when something happens.

It’s hard to maintain a balanced mind and not zero in on specific expectations when we think we know what tomorrow (or even today) is going to be like, but it’s ultimately worth it to try.

Stay Positive & Ready For Anything

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There’s the emotion of empathy and trust and “I’ve got your back no matter what.” There’s also the emotion of determination to ride out a bad wave.

That’s professional emotion.

Then there’s the emotion of hiding, not being to blame, frustration about the process and defeat. There’s also the result of shutting down and not delivering on our promises because of fear or adversity.

That’s not professional emotion.

Your tribe’s not here to hear you complain; They’re here to see your smile and your passion whether you feel like it or not.

There’s a reason they call it emotional labor.

Stay Positive & Professionals Lift Daily

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That’s what people want.

Maybe the something is community or a process or a success or simply a story, but they want to be part of it.

It’s rare that they want to be the entire something. That’s risky and just not them.

So it begs the question of how you’re getting them involved in your journey.

You can ask them questions, invite them to review a project, give them a gift (even if it’s merely time or a kind word).

I’m sure you have more to offer than you think, and there are so many out there who want to be part of what you’re doing.

It’s a tall order.

The beauty is once we open the door and make the connection, they often come back on their own accord, without incentive, because it’s the feeling they were after all along, anyway.

Same can be said for why you began your journey, too, couldn’t it?

Stay Positive & Part Of A Feeling

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There’s a very popular road in town. If you’re pessimistic, you drive down and decide there’s no parking nearby because the spots you see on the busy road are all taken.

However, a recent survey showed that 60 percent of the street side parking – a mere turn off the main road (!) – goes unused at any point within the day.

Sometimes that’s how it is, though. Opportunity shows up where we want it, so long as we’re willing to make a turn or two down the road.

Stay Positive & Still Use Your Blinker

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There’s a significant number of people who live each day to uphold the status quo (you?).

In present day communities, it’s not even about what we’ll tell our neighbors about a decision.

We can control our voice and the story we tell others about ourselves.

The voice we can’t control is the one that tells someone else.

It’s more of a concern of what our neighbors will tell, what our family will say behind our backs, the words our our coworkers will share with our boss.

Thing is, trying to control the voice of others is an unwinnable war. As with most things in life, it’s better to focus on what matters: The words you use with those who mean a lot to you.

Stay Positive & Choose The Words Carefully (They May Be Repeated)

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There’s a wickedly smart worker at a business downtown. The work she does is excellent and the connections she makes with customers keep them coming back.

But, every now and then, people wonder why she’s not where she’s supposed to be on time, why the project didn’t get completed on deadline, why her attitude is poor.

It’s because of people like her that many of us wave the words around, “I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt.” We understand there’s a likely reason for the unexpected actions.

However, many may think she’s so talented that nothing could bring her down or make her fumble on the job. They’ve created an ideal of perfection, which, to a degree, is the fault of the worker herself for setting the bar so high. Sure.

But, it’s near-sighted to hold someone else accountable for being incredible 100 percent of the time even when we’re used to it.

Equally unfair to expecting perfection is wishing the imperfection away or trying to force the excellence in one area of life to another.

I’d say it’s the flaws, the fact there are reasons to offer people the benefit of the doubt that makes them a joy to work with and be around.

Imagine for a moment if the person who is excellent at work is the same at home and in their community. You probably imagine a robot void of emotion, right? Because that’s what it would take for someone to excel at every facet of their life.

So, maybe benefit of the doubt is the wrong expression to use. Maybe it’s, “They’re human. Let’s talk to them to see what the source of the issue is and how we can help. Maybe they only need some slack or maybe they need a friend.”

Responsibility isn’t about letting people be. It’s being there for them when they’re on and even closer when they’re off.

That’s the real benefit of the doubt.

Stay Positive & “How Can I Help?” May Be The Most Powerful Words

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Spending time arguing over trivial this or thats is a poor investment.

Notice the discord and move on to focusing on things that amplify what you both agree on.

It’s our responsibility to recognize the moment and find not just the common ground, but also the higher one for both of us.

There’s only so much time in a day, anyway.

Do you really want to waste hours of it on trivial disagreements?

Stay Positive & Pivot

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