Feelings

Selling Feelings

Garth Beyer

At a grocery store the other week I got in line with my cart of food, which included organic bananas. When the cashier grabbed the bananas, he said, “you know that it’s dumb to pay extra for organic bananas that are genetically identical to regular bananas, right?”

I had no clue how to respond.

—

You know those “I should have said…” moments, when you think of the perfect response after the fact? It was one of those situations.

If I could rewind time I would have reminded him we don’t purchase things because of what people label them with, not directly anyway. We pay for products and services to feel a particular way.

Organic bananas and regular bananas may have the same genetic compound and benefit my body in the same way scientifically, but they make me feel completely different.

I feel cleaner eating organic bananas, and thus happier, more content with my choice. I feel like my body benefits more with organic bananas: I have more energy, a fuller stomach, better poops. And perhaps it’s just my mind, but I think organic bananas taste better too.

—

When we challenge, doubt, and write off everything, when we settle for the generic and the banal, we also sacrifice the benefits that come with ignorance, that come with placebos, that come with just feeling good!

I’ve been known to say, “It feels good, to feel good.”

I won’t let a know-it-all cashier stop me from that. Organic Bananas, always.

 

Stay Positive & He’s Bananas

Age Matters, But Should It?

Age Matters, But Should It?

Garth Beyer

Steve Jobs has more experience than me, but if I have read up on every single lesson he has learned from all his experience, then does he actually know more? or do we know the same amount? or do I still know less?

I’m toying with the concept of age and why it matters so much. I’ve had a number of experiences where I could do something, but my age got in the way.

While still in high school I applied for a newspaper job, a job people go through four years of college to do and number of internships to get, but I knew I could do it well enough or at least learn fast enough to do it as well as anyone else.

No surprise, I didn’t get the job. I was too young.

I wanted to run a seminar on finances, but was told not enough people would come because what 40-year-old is going to believe anything a 19-year-old has to say, regardless of the fact I’ve written more than 200 articles on money management, started selling at age 6, bought a Corvette at the age of 15, and graduated without any debt and studied everything all the financial gurus put out there.

Even with the experience, I was still too young.

Knowledge is power…so long as you’re at an age people will believe that

I’m constantly blogging about business, startups, and public relations concepts. I’m spitting out things I know to be true, part from experience, part from obsessively studying others’ success and failures and learning from other people.

If I’m not talking to someone about the marketing industry or a business idea either of us have, I have buds in my ear listening to others share their stories via podcasts, if not that, I’m lifting weights while thinking about trends or talking to my girlfriend about the next thing I’m going to chase. I’m a carrot guy, not a stick guy, and I’m still not as trusted as Steve Jobs, Seth Godin or Chris Brogan because, well, they’re older than me.

Knowledge, wisdom, insight are all very subjective matters. I’ve worked heavily the last year and a half to convince others I have all the above despite my (in the grand scheme of things) minimum amount of experience. Through that process I’ve lost connection with a lot of my readers. After an email from a blunt friend and conversation with my girlfriend (likely to be posted on my blog tomorrow), I’ve realized I stopped doing what I preach others to do: be personal.

Age matters, and fighting the perception others have is an uphill battle I’m exhausted fighting. Instead of sharing what I know, I will again be sharing how I came to know it. I’ll show how I’ve become a 22-year-old with a 30-year-old brain and why I find myself saying “I’m such an old man” more often than I like.

I invite you to stop by GarthBox more often. There will be more about my suffering, anxiety, nervousness, uncertainty, risk-taking, and lying to myself, and, of course, how I’ve overcome it all.

 

Stay Positive & Stick Around For The Ride

*In lieu of this sort-of announcement blog post, In The Box Podcast will be available on iTunes beginning of March. My cohost Michael Langlois and I chat about 6 themes, which you’ll know about in advance of each podcast so you can listen to just what you want to hear. I hope you find them all interesting and…personal.


					

	
	



			
				



	
	

		
In A Glass Please


					

				Garth Beyer			

			


			

			
It’s not coincidence that wine tastes better in a wine glass. Not scientifically, of course.


Scientifically, the wine tastes the same in a wine glass as it does in a styrofoam cup.


The same goes for how you feel wearing a suit. When I put one on, I feel like I’m important, I feel like I can walk into a room and own it, I feel respected. Are we any different wearing a suit as we are wearing shorts and a sleeveless shirt, scientifically? I’m still me. You’re still you. Scientifically.


One more example,


Treat yourself to a cold can of bud light. Then treat yourself to a cold glass of bud light. Which tastes better?


We have these world views, these wonderful world views that in the most simplest form are summed up into that which we want to believe, is true.


We become more outgoing and astute when we put on a suit because that is what we believe a suit will do. The wine, the water, the beer, the tea, the coffee – tastes great in whatever glass we have it in because we believe that it will. So it goes…


The single best story punctures through the noise in two ways:


1) It parallels a worldview that we already hold.


2) It makes a promise that we will feel a certain way when we have or use the product.


Marketing, branding, advertising – whatever you want to label it – has one goal. To get people to attribute a feeling with a particular product or service. It’s damn difficult. That’s what makes marketing so valuable.


 


Stay Positive & In Marketing, Numbers Are Little, Worldviews Are Huge

					

	
	



			
				



	
	

		
Can’t Tell


					

				Garth Beyer			

			


			

			
And the worst thing is, you can’t tell.


You can’t tell that the person beside you may be heart-broken. You can’t tell if they are hurting all over. You can’t tell if they’re struggling to smile. You can’t tell if they just want to break down and cry. And the sad thing is; they wish you could tell.


You can’t tell if you’re bored or hungry, you can’t tell if it’s love you are actually feeling, you can’t tell what someones first judgement of you is, you can’t tell if that person will ever come around. And the sad thing is: you wish you could tell.


There’s a lot of things in life that you just can’t tell.


I’ve always said, it’s not that everyone is fighting their own battles.


It’s that they are losing them.


 


Stay Positive & Give People A Chance


Garth E. Beyer

					

	
	



			
				



	
	

		
Riding A Bike (No analogy, just a lesson)


					

				Garth Beyer			

			


			

			


I cried a lot as a kid so it’s rare that I can remember a specific cry. The one I can recall is my first cry while trying to ride a bike for the first time. I remember my dad running behind me, keeping me steady. I yelled at him to NOT let go. He did. It ended up with me crying.


I’ve read a lot of analogies and quotes about life in relation to riding a bike. There’s something universal about teaching a kid to ride a bike; it’s not just a lesson about riding a bike, it’s a life lesson.


Step one: Make sure the kid knows that he is going to fall off the bike and if the kid is anything like any other kid, will cry and be afraid to ride again. Prepare the kid for it. Tell him what will happen. Do this at first.


Step two: then switch your words of honesty with words of encouragement immediately upon the first fall. Tell the kid that he is going to ride smoothly, keep the handlebars steady, pedal slow and thoroughly and will succeed.


Step three: Pat on the back. He’s done it.


The strongest feelings in this world are the ones that surprise you. This means that they can be any type of feeling: sad, lonely, happy, guilty, scared, proud, etc,.  There is less of a feeling if you expect it, or in this case, if a kid expects to fall off the bike and hurt himself it won’t hurt nearly as bad if he didn’t expect it.


As we likely know, but often forget, once we fail, we are that much closer to success. We hold this expectation of falling off the bike again and hurting ourselves. But when we don’t fall, when the kid finally rides the bike without it resulting in tears, it’s the strongest feeling in the world; much stronger than getting it right the first time.


Success doesn’t move us, the feelings of it do.


 


Stay Positive & Feel More


Garth E. Beyer

					

	
	



			
				



	
	

		
Garth’s Third Law Of Emotion


					

				Garth Beyer			

			


			

			
You’re parents just got into a divorce now you are torn between who to live with, all of your role models that helped you get through the hard times went off into the army or moved away, your friends have excluded you from their group, your sibling that you are closest too has gotten far into drugs and alcohol, and your grandpa who you were really close to has recently passed away. In essence, you feel like you no longer have a family.


Each and every one of us goes through extremely harsh points in our lives where we feel like we have absolutely no one.


Anger.. guilt.. sorrow… nothing can compare to the feeling of loneliness.


Whether you notice it or not, we all eventually come out of the slum, and things get better bit by bit. Have you ever thought of how it all started going downhill though?


Some days we feel like one bad thing happens after another, and after each bad thing that occurs, we feel worse and worse, as if the world is dissolving around us. These occurrences affect our thinking. We begin thinking more and more negatively. If you are feeling down, you don think positively at all, you dwell further in your emotions and the unfortunate circumstances that have occurred.


I want to let you in on a secret, the one way to get through all life throws at you, the secret… Stay Positive. Easier said than done huh?


If you are reading this, you likely know me well or understand that I am a very optimistic person. But even a happy outgoing person can find it nearly impossible to turn some negative circumstances into positive ones.


The list I gave you at the beginning of this discussion, of the divorce, the losing of a close one to death, and having your friends move away or exclude you – these are all personal experiences that have happened to me.


How can one person make it through all of those situations happening to them in such a short amount of time? With practice, I’ve found there to be two different ways to not just make it through, but to also turn life around.


Now, I think we have all tricked ourselves or lied to ourselves at one point, whether it be by telling ourselves “I can do it” to get rid of some sort of fear, or lying to yourself that you aren’t still in love with your ex, so you can move on. The idea I have come to find to make it through such hard times is this.


First way: Deceive yourself, but do it in a positive way. To get rid of the sorrow that losing your friends has brought to you, start thinking about making new friends, and how much fun it will be hanging out with them.


You need to aim for a feeling. The feeling you want to have your friends make you feel, the feeling of company, of sharing, of fun. Soon enough you will see things starting to shape up. Maybe your old friends have invited you to go to the mall or you met a new friend. 


We noted before that one bad thing happens after another. It is the same for the good things in life if you can just lean your feelings in that positive direction.


Now the harder of the two ways to start turning your life back around is to find something good in every bad, and this is possible.


Coming to a close, I want you to think of something you disliked about today so far, something that set your temper off, or hurt you emotionally, something you would have done differently. It can be the sort of thing from having a fight with your dad, or your internet being out. So go ahead and think of something…


The Challenge: I want you to use the harder of the two ways to become more positive and in a better mood by figuring out one optimistic thing that came out of the one unfortunate thing so far today.


Maybe your thought is your dad is now going to surprise you with an apology gift, or because your internet was off you so you took a walk outside and ran into your soul mate. (Hey, it could happen)


Newton has said that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, I would employ you to have the idea that, for every action of negative thought there is an opposite, if not greater reaction.


So remember, for every negative thing in life, there will always be at least one positive thing to be thought of about it.. it’s up to you.


 


Stay Positive & This Is The One Time You Don’t Want Balance


Garth E. Beyer