Why The Apologies?

It’s a problem of people’s.

There are only a handful of predicaments that will ignite an immediate response (positive or assertive) from me: if you’re complaining, if you’re being thankful, if you’re telling me about challenging the norms, and most regularly, if you’re apologizing.

Given the theme of my usual writing, you may assume that I am referring to apologies made by writers for not shipping their art, or someone apologizing for sending an email that is kind of like spam, or, the worst, just starting anything with an apology. In these cases, if you’re going to apologize, just don’t do whatever you’re going to apologize for. It just leaves a vituperative taste to your message.

Instead, filter your message, specify your audience, narrow your goal or your audience, do whatever it takes to not feel the need to initiate your message with an apology. Messages that start or even contain an apology (unless your Apple, apologizing for their version of maps), will rarely be efficacious. In most cases, if you can’t find a way to eliminate the apology, not doing anything is the best alternative.

But as I said, that’s not what I’m really referring to. The apologies that truly need to stop are the general ones, the off-brand apologies, the ones which lack insincerity. Have you heard these before or any similar to?

“I’m sorry, I’m just too busy.”

“It’s just not going to work, I’m sorry.”

“I’ve got to focus on myself, I’m sorry.”

Okay, maybe some of the apologies do have sincerity, but there is still no reason to apologize for, what the hipsters these days would call “doing you.” Our society has this preconception that we must apologize for doing things for ourselves, that if a decision we make that benefits us but clashes with someone else’s plans, we have to apologize.

I’m writing to tell you that you don’t.

 

Stay Positive & Please Yourself (There’s No Way You Can Please Everybody Else)

Garth E. Beyer

p.s. And this is why you don’t have to > My favorite concept and reason to quit saying sorry. It can be applied to anything, not just articles.

I Want To Help, But Me First

A group of people were asked what they would do if they no longer had any financial restrictions.

Some said they would travel, some said they would purchase the newest Corvette prototype, some said they would read everything on their book list. These ideas of material or selfish items are the minority.

Most said they would give. Give their time to volunteer, give their personalities to build their communities, give their money through anonymous donations; basically, give their lives to benefit others.

The moment they no longer need to worry – more so financially speaking – about themselves, the more willing they are to help others. This brings about a few questions. Is civilization wrong to not promote initial selflessness (not needing to support yourself first)? Are we naturally selfish? Naturally selfless? Quite frankly, why don’t we do what we want, give? After all, nothing is stopping you from giving.

Unfortunately there is a part missing to this survey: the follow-through. What would these people actually do if they were relieved of their financial restrictions and burdens, finally able to help others the way they dream about?

I’m not entirely sure. What would you do though if economics suddenly turned in your favor?

 

Stay Positive & Give A Little? Give A Lot? It’s Still Giving

Garth E. Beyer